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How Do I Ask For Help? 

We are not here alone. There are many, many others on this planet that we can reach out to for support, assistance, guidance and much more. Yet, we choose to go it alone quite often when what we need the most is help.


Why is it so hard to ask for help? The answer? Simply put: fear.

Fear of rejection, fear of being thought of as weak or fear of being judged. Asking for help takes awareness and courage. Vulnerability creates strength. Many times, we hear the word “no” as personal, when it may be that the person we have sought help from is not able to help. Rather than stopping with that person, move on and ask another.

If you are struggling with any sort of addiction or mental illness, being aware that you need to seek help is a strong beginning. You will gain much more than you ever imagined by reaching out to others.

Asking for help can relieve anxiety and stress. Asking for help creates a connection between you and another person. Many people are honored when someone asks them to help. Asking for help open you up to a new learning experience and a different point of view. It can help you become unstuck.

There are different ways to ask for help. Talking to someone you trust, face-to-face can be freeing and will help you realize you are not alone. It may be uncomfortable to admit that you don’t know what your next step should be and that you are struggling with an addiction or mental illness, but just knowing that someone is there to listen and offer support and advice will help you make the next best step.

Writing can be a cathartic experience and for some is the best way to communicate their truth to another. It may be easier to send a letter or email to someone rather than revealing yourself in person. Writing allows you to carefully consider what you are asking for and to convey what you are struggling with. You can also read over the letter before sending it and make corrections if needed.

Seeking medical assistance can help you determine how severe your addiction or illness is. A Doctor will know what to ask and can point you in the right direction for your specific struggles, and can refer you to a specialist, if needed.

If you aren’t quite ready to ask another person, search online. Educating yourself about your struggles can make everything seem less daunting and give you a better sense of control. There are also numerous helplines. Having a conversation with someone that you do not personally know, over the phone, can be much less intimidating, and you can be assured that the people who answer those phones want to help.

There is no one way or “right way” to ask for help. What matters is that you ask. It can make all the difference.